You couldn’t make it up, the singer says. At that moment gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mother of a toddler after struggling to conceive for ten years, on top of the world. Suddenly in spring she was told she had breast cancer.
The singer-songwriter, birth name Jessica Cornish, is famous for being brutally honest. The LP, her latest release, was meant as an transparent story, dealing with every ounce of devastation she’d faced since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, losing a baby, broken romances, psychological manipulation, suicide) with her usual frankness. The initial release, the song No Secrets, was released in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. Her diagnosis. Later follow-up track, the upbeat Living My Best Life, was released in late spring and she was talking to press about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while all the while dealing with the disease. A month later she went public, and in July she had a mastectomy.
She offers me her best “What the fuck?” look. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every media appearance, and they’re, like, ‘What’s happening?’ and I’m, like, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” she has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s yet to undergo cosmetic procedures.
We meet at a photo studio in London. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, jeans with elaborate white patches, beige footwear and oversized specs. Imagine biker chic meets 1970s Nana Mouskouri. “As if I’m in the 1970s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, referencing the picture. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She grins. Cornish is sharp-witted, irreverent and direct. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is aiming for her first comedy performance soon. “I love making people laugh. During performances I frequently joke about the crowd.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
She was planning an slot at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I promptly visited to get it examined, had an test, and they told me, ‘It looks like nothing; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I insisted, ‘Yet I sense it. My arm hurts and numbness in my fingers whenever I rise.’ And they said, ‘How about a biopsy?’ It happened on March 28, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was bad news she’d reach out on the start of the week. By then the singer had assured herself it was nothing. The way she explains it, it was inopportune to get cancer when she had so much on.
“It was a fortnight prior from debuting the project after years away and an extended break. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I log in expecting it’s all going to be positive, and she says, ‘You might want to sit.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘I regret to inform you but your test results have come back as malignant cells.’” What was your reaction? “I replied, ‘Oh, that’s not ideal, is it?. The timing is terrible.’ Immediately I felt was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She found the surgery frightening and surreal. “I dislike anesthesia. They lead you. In urgent cases you are wheeled, but then I just marched with a medical attire and my rear exposed. Like a dystopian scene.” But, Cornish says, she’s been blessed. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the op. “Cancer is awful, but however Thank fuck I found it early. The surgery happened a few months back and my affected breast now appears as a fruit under fabric.” A further beam. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The subsequent surgery is for health and appearance. Her boobs, she observes, are now “different sizes. The size doesn’t match. So inconsiderate! I felt, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a difficult experience. So rude! Ironically I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be perfect. Cancer ruined that plan.”
Previous Struggles
Cornish is no stranger to illness. She thinks her perspective on the cancer has been so optimistic because she’s used to physical challenges. Frequently they align with professional successes, acting as a reminder, or punch in the stomach, to remind her not to take anything for granted. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside moments of success for me; a serious or unusual issue has happened to my health.”
She takes me back to her youth, already making her debut performing in the West End in Whistle Down the Wind (she was chosen at the age of 9). That’s when she was diagnosed with the medical problem a syndrome, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as dizziness and irregular beats. “I rehearsed between visits on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She fast-forwards several years, and young Jessica has entered the female band Soul Deep while studying at the performing arts school. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a stroke. Then when I was ready to debut in recently I had a car crash and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a year.”
Wow, I say, wait, I can’t keep up. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees
